By Taylah Eastwell
Mum’s have mother’s clubs. Veterans often find themselves getting involved at the RSL down the road. Retirees and craftsmen hang out at the local men’s shed, where long-lasting, trusty friendships (and woodwork pieces) are formed.
But what about the dads, and men that don’t quite fit into the demographic of these social groups?
In steps Mountain Men.
Mountain Men is a social support group for men in the Dandenong Ranges focused on engagement and inclusion. The group offers a non-judgmental, safe space for men to participate in a range of social activities that encourage new friendships to blossom.
Co-founder of Mountain Men Inc, Heath Pawley, described the group as “a social group for men, or people that identify as men, to bridge the gap between younger age groups where people have friends from school and older age groups where people may have retired”.
“It’s more of a social group to build community and connections for those between 25-55, but there is no set age. It’s very inclusive, not a toxic masculinity or blokey bloke vibe at all, we are all just there to chat and socialise,” Mr Pawley said.
“One of the things we’ve found through people that come along is that a lot of the guys in that age group that may or may not have kids are feeling isolated. They might have moved away from where their friends live or are just finding it hard to make connections with people,” he said.
Mr Pawley said Mountain Men’s mission and focus is similar to that of a Men’s Sshed in the sense that it’s all about getting guys talking and doing activities.
“It’s about making connections in healthy environments, not just a group of guys going down the pub,” Mr Pawley joked.
“We aren’t a mental health provider but it is a big underlying focus. We do activities to promote positive mental health such as run clubs, soccer in the park, talks – we have done some presentations on food and health and wellbeing so we are taking some of the elements of mental health and addressing the peripheral stuff,” he said.
The group get together for a number of different activities, ranging from a coffee in the park to monthly yarning circles, where a different topic is chosen for each session and an expert speaker presents and allows men to ask any questions. Mr Pawley said the last few yarning circles have been on food and health, financial planning and gardening.
“Our last presentation on work life balance was online, the next one is about garden tool maintenance and safety.
“It’s been very hard moving online because the whole idea of starting the group was to address one key message, and that was the fact so many people were sick of talking on Facebook and online, so it’s kind of contradictory to the whole reason we started to be doing it online, but we are looking at ways of managing that from fitness classes outside keeping numbers down and a few other ways as Covid allows. We are trying to be flexible,” Mr Pawley said.
“It’s also been hard letting men know we are here these days because if you’re not online you don’t get a lot of information. A lot of the men that come along do so after their wife or partner told them they should come along and socialise,” he laughed.
The group is focused on the southern Dandenongs and receives funding from both Cardinia and Yarra Ranges councils.
“We’ve got people that come from Belgrave, Olinda, Mt Evelyn, we are definitely trying to capture the whole Ranges and anyone in the area is welcome to come up. It’s not a postcode or Yarra Ranges only thing, it’s open to everyone, we’ve also had some from Boronia and Ferntree Gully,” he said.
Mr Pawley said Covid-19 lockdowns have given dads the opportunity to take a “more active role in the household with online schooling and working from home”.
“It’s been fantastic for them getting hours back at home rather than commuting. But on the flip side, I recently did a dads class and learnt that some industries have been absolutely berserk and a few people haven’t seen their kids for like six months, except for weekends, because they are in bed when they leave and come home,” he said.
“It’s varied depending on what role they might be in but there’s not much else you can do in lockdown other than go to the park with the kids and I think a lot of dads have found that really rewarding and awesome, they’ll be memories that they’ll treasure.
The group isn’t a set commitment, with men welcome to come along as and when suits them, and while they are not mental health professionals, they are linked in with local services and able to provide assistance to men who may also be struggling.
Anyone interested can join the closed Mountain Men Facebook group or contact Heath through the website at https://www.mountainmen.org.au/contact.
